The Golden Girls

A nasty reminder came in the mail recently, it was another invite to join the AARP. No thanks! But it did get me thinking about retirement.

I don't have much of a plan but my sketchy dream is to live out my golden years with some BFF's in a condo in a warmer climate. We'll take walks on the beach every morning and we'll shop the boardwalk every afternoon. I hope to keep my car in the carport and do all my boardwalk commutes with a little shuffle and a little wiggle. Ah and then we'll rest up and get partied up for our evening dates. Assuming there's more than 3 eligible bachelors in our senior community.

Sounds familiar doesn't it? I think that show, The Golden Girls had it right. We women can have it all. Even if we can't remember where we put it, our BFF's will help us find it, ha.

I've been lucky to still have my very first friends. They were some of the first girls I met in the neighborhood, back in the day. We don't ride our Raleighs to Seven-11 anymore. We don't put on fake accents to meet boys at the beach. We've graduated in many ways. But we still meet up for brunch or lunch and laugh about the old days.

As life gives us some twists and turns we'll be there for each other just like Bea Arthur was for Betty White. I'm looking forward to my retirement and living out my Golden Years with my Golden Girls. So if in 20 years your phone rings and someone with a giggle asks....."Do you have Jim Bean in a bottle? Well let him out he's drowning" you'll know it's me and the girls pulling prank calls from our condo on the beach.

Enjoy the theme song from the TV show, The Golden Girls

http://www.myspace.com/video/noizyneighbour/andrew-gold-thank-you-for-being-a-friend/5510300

Out on the Streets (Bruce Springsteen)

As I scour the database at work editing addresses putting commas in place, capping proper nouns, and extending those nasty abbreviations I've come across some great addresses and it's given me pause to think about street names. I wonder, would the name of your street seal the deal when buying your next home?

We have a Columbine Avenue where I live. Selling a home on that block must be every realtor's nightmare. Or would your kids have nightmares....... living on Loch Ness Road? Every little girl would love waking up on Rainbow Drive or Enchanted Point.  How about Candy Cove or Sunnyslope?

Growing up in Richfield, we had a house a few blocks over that, despite having a practical and numerical address of 12th Avenue, was totally haunted. I never saw a soul in the place and it was old and rundown with busted attic windows frequented by bats and stray baseballs. Anytime I had to pass by I would quicken my step and always, always cross the street to be a safe distance away. And if on Halloween I made my way over there on that dark scary night.......well I knew I wasn't ringing their doorbell for treats (or tricks).

Neighborhoods get their reputations from the homes, the people that live in them, and the surrounding street names. Given my penchant for wanting to live like a Queen I've always felt drawn to the King's Highway stretch of gorgeous old homes in Minneapolis near the lakes. They are regal and old school with landscaped yards and inviting paths leading up to the door.

I wanted funky architecture and secret doors leading under the stairs in my first home but instead I found my way to a set of identical town homes set one atop the other. It wasn't old and it wasn't unique. There would be no Nancy Drew mysteries to solve under my stairs because I didn't have stairs. Ah, but it was new and so bright and filled with possibilities. What clinched the deal for this wide eyed first time home buyer? The address of course........Providence Drive!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qZbyLsiHzY

Enjoy this video of the Boss, Bruce Springsteen, singing Out on the Streets.

Rocking Down the Highway

As I'm listening to the Doobie Brothers sing an old classic, "Rocking Down the Highway," it makes me value the work of my mechanic that got me back on the road last month. Where would we be without those greased up guys in coveralls?

Repair shops outnumber donut shops - but it takes a special car crisis for the names of these mechanics to be whispered about. Like the rumored little black book that single men kept with the names and phone numbers of all their dates......today's married men keep a crumpled yellow post-it note buried deep in their wallet with the name of their favorite mechanic. More than once I heard the phrase whispered benevolently......well......yes....I've got a guy you can call.

My truck is back on the road thanks to Shakopee Midas and all their hard work. It comes and goes and hums and purrs in all the right places. Now I have the open road before me and all summer to plan my road trips. Did I mention how cute the mechanic was that handed me my keys? I might have to go back for the free tire rotation after 2K miles. Why you ask? Because I'm a little curious about how many pages are in his little black book, LOL.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHJaqe12BIc
Check out the link above to hear the Doobie Brothers live.

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

To fix or not to fix: that is the question. I have an old truck with great bones that got a little sick this week. I had to decide whether to end our relationship (which I've been pretty good at lately) or whether to stay committed. The decision cost me a pretty penny. When I was a young girl dreaming about love......I always wanted my legacy to be one love and one man for one lifetime. Funny how with cars there's no cultural assumptions on the love life with your car. In fact, if you believed the commercials, society expects us to upgrade our wheels to appear successful and popular - driving something used and worn would never fly as a commercial on Super Bowl Sunday.

Speaking of flying, my first car crush was the jalopy in the movie, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Silly, eccentric Dick Van Dyke tinkered with an old car until he could get it to fly. Man, I wanted a flying car. Sure the Jetson's had rocket cars that flew in outer space but I wanted something that would take me from the East side of Richfield to the West side on a Saturday.

A girl's history of her cars is like her long list of boyfriends. We can remember our "first" like it was yesterday. And if we were frugal and moderate with our money we can list on one hand of all the cars we've "driven." If you need 2 hands or more for the list......well let's just say you've been around the block more than me.

I'd like to brag someday that I drove my truck past 200K miles and to get there I need to stay on my 3 year plan. Darn, no flying cars for me. I reluctantly paid the repair bill at Midas yesterday with a big sigh. As I walked over to my cute red truck dangling those familiar keys in my hand, I couldn't help but think.......maybe a fling with an Avis convertible now and again would be just the ticket!

Bumper Sticker: I LOVE MATH

Are You Smarter Than A Fourth Grader? I thought I was but some nights I'm not sure, ha. Homework this year has gotten exponentially harder. Turns out September - December were basically a Third grade review the teacher said and real Fourth Grade work started in January. Ack, no wonder it's gotten so hard?

As I wait for my son's phone call at 4:15pm everyday I'm anxious to hear the answer to #12 and find out how many wrong "we" got on the assignment. I'm fist pumping the air when he announces an A or a B on a Math test! It wasn't always like that. I remember hating Math and all those word problems in school. You know the kind? The new ones are just as hard........

Mitchell is driving south at 55 MPH and Laura is driving north at 63 MPH. If both destinations are 1039 miles apart what time will Laura text Mitchell to say that she's lost? What time will Mitchell run out of gas since he left on a quarter of a tank? Stay tuned and maybe some Redneck will have the answers, LOL.

All I know is it takes 2 people to do the Math, check the Math, and get it to school the next morning. We have a dog and he certainly has taken a liking to pencils and homework assignments.

Today I installed a printer to my laptop and as I unpacked the directions I had that same momentary fear I used to have in Math class. Can I do it? Can I figure it out? Will I have to ask the cute guy in the next row for his answers? No worries mate! The directions were in English (& French) and VOILA I have my first Mapquest page of directions printed. I need to catch up with Mitchell and Laura - they called from the road with car troubles, ha.

How’s My Driving? Call 1.800.GET.A.LIFE

 

Caution: This Vehicle Makes Wide Turns

OMG, I’m fat again. How did that happen? I get skinny and I get fat again. My dress size is a crapshoot. I was hoping to lose weight last fall before I started this online dating site. But it was autumn and I had to make warm comfort foods and rich desserts. Then I was going to lose weight before the holidays. Nope, too busy. Then when I met someone I thought-- - hey now I will really be motivated to lose weight! Ah, not so much. It actually gave me a false confidence to stay fat and sassy, ha.

Parking: Compact Cars Only

It’s funny; initially I was intimidated to even browse the online dating sites thinking every guy wanted a skinny younger girl to date. I’ve only just started, and maybe I’m having beginner’s luck, but so far my dates don’t mind a fat girl. What is the one thing they all agree on?  NO RAP MUSIC. There’s not a single white guy over 50 that lists RAP on their profile. I’m just saying??

Please Do Not Tailgate

My dating mantra is: fall in love 4 times but marry no one. I’d like to have consistent weekly dates that are loads of fun and after a long set of months or years then we’d naturally end the relationship when it feels right. I don’t know if that’s possible but I’m on the road to discovery?

No Parking: Pick Up and Drop Off Only

What are my stats so far you ask? I’ve chatted with 5 guys, dated 2 of them, eliminated 2, and still hopeful for the remaining good humored father of teens?

How’s My Driving? Call 1.800.GET.A.LIFE

It’s a grey grey world out there, me included. It used to be so easy when life was black and white and you judged people by how closely they towed the line. And then life happened and now the world is very grey and I guess I’m comfortable living in the grey. I have a list of what I’m looking for but my definition of SWM could still fill a thesaurus.

Dating was all just a science experiment, really. I wanted to push myself out of my comfort zone and see if I could find myself a nice Christian guy to date at this size and at this time in my life. It’s proving true that we are all universally bent towards love and looking for a happy relationship regardless of our pants size. If the good humored father of teens doesn’t work out though, I’m going back to scrapbooking. LOL.

Mapquest My Heart

The road less travelled made all the difference......to who? To somebody that drove a boring car, at boring speeds, with boring music - that's who. When I'm looking for direction on the road I can use a GPS, I can Mapquest it, or do the old AAA thing. All roads lead to the same destination but sometimes the getting there is messy.

The same with love. We all want it, we all seek it, it's the getting there that gets messy.

This was a big week for lovers. Lots of hype and expectation hovering on Valentine's Day. I've had the roses and chocolates and long kisses on V-Day. I've had years where the single flower came from Super America along with gas, gum, and a car wash. And finally, I had a few years where we pretended it didn't matter because were so solid (yeah, right).

Having my first Valentine's Day with a new guy in the picture set my heart aflutter. Would he be simple and tender, would he be funny and cute, or would he go over the top with romance? So many options for one special day. But alas, my non-romantic and hard working Boy Scout spent the day rescuing his family and friends from peril and destruction while I sat alone with a feeble text wishing me a happy day. Don't cry for me Argentina, ha, I'm a big girl. It was disappointing but life goes on.

According to E-Harmony, a girl should date 2-3 guys at once so as to NOT fall for the wrong guy. Oh, so the way to avoid a broken heart is to give it away to 3 guys at once? Seemed kind of risky but I am a player so I'll try anything once. I told Mr. No Romance that I was busy last night and went out with Guy #2 and then came home and found that online Guy #3 I've been toying with and invited him for coffee next week. Maybe this mashup of men, personalities, and attention will shake out in a better direction.

All I know for sure is that when I want cuddles and giggles all I have to say is SLEEP OUT and my son comes running. Our combo couch/bed is a new fascination for this younger generation. So as we snuggled in our PJ's and blankets on the pullout bed I smiled contentedly and felt so happy. Sharing a box of Thin Mints and watching Disney Channel made me think.....I'm glad the road to my son's heart is so easy.